Grateful

I owe a world of thanks to my sweet mother in law who willingly gave 6 weeks of her life to clean our house top to bottom and play games and giggle with our little ones and bring a sense of peace and order to the sometimes unpredictable new addition to the family. Thank you so very much for your care and your heart and your generosity. It has lightened my load and brightened my heart...

R&R

Tim arrived home for his long awaited R&R on October 21. He managed to rearrange his flight from late afternoon to early morning. We got the call that he would arrive within the hour and we rushed to get ready and be there on time. From the moment he arrived everything was so peaceful, so many laughs, it was just about perfect. We went to the pumpkin patch, spent long hours out in the sunshine, played and laughed till our sides ached, drank lots of chai, played many a game of freeze tag and hide and seek went trick or treating and had a Christmas celebration and a baby to boot.Two weeks seemed to stretch on forever and even though he's back in Balaad now we have so many great memories and so much anticipation for his return.

Life with Will

Our boy's here!! Will Ryan made his appearance exactly one week after Tim arrived home for R&R. It couldn't have worked out more perfectly if we planned it ourselves. We were scheduled for an induction on Friday the 30th but around 2:30 AM on Wednesday something got to feeling not quite right and I could not get comfortable enough to sleep. Unsure of whether I was really in labor I showered and prepped but hesitated waking Tim.

I finally woke him when I couldn't breathe through the pain and he insisted we head for the hospital ASAP. Once in the parking lot I tried to persuade him to wait it out in the car with me a little longer to make sure we really were in labor. I felt embarassed at the thought of going in there only to be told I was imagining it all (Silly I know). "Sarah we are not going to wait in case this is real labor and we head in there too late for drugs!" Smart man I married. Point well taken I scurried to the ER doors obligingly.

And yes Virginia, we really were in labor. After some fetal monitoring and an hours walk around the outside of the hospital we were admitted to a room. Now without slighting my girls who decide to go it au natural or to make light of the pain and struggle they go through to do so, I will now celebrate the beauty of a medicated labor.

With each of my babies I have first requested IV pain medication once the contractions began seizing me as though my lower half were being severed completely. The relaxation and peace becomes tangible in the room and Tim and I are able to share yummy hot drinks and laugh and watch silly TV shows and reminisce and dream. My hospital stays cannot be described as labor. Instead they feel like a two day vacation just for us (I kid you not), this time notwithstanding.

We exchanged witty repartee and life stories with our nurses, made jokes with the anesthesiologist, I munched many a cupful of ice shavings, downed a couple popsicles and pleasantly and calmly and almost pain free (that horrible pressure cannot be drugged away) we waited for our little man to arrive. We even took a few catnaps, the nurses smiled when they'd come in to check as we were both covered up and resting comfortably.

Then about an hour after my epidural it was time to push. After 3 and a half pushes Will was out. Wide eyed and alert just like his sister and brother before him he cried only momentarily and quieted when Tim began to sing to him. After I was repaired and he was cleaned up he began to nurse almost immediately and so began life with Will.

He is calm and quiet, cries not more than 20 minutes total each day. Sleeps for at least 4 hours at a time (making my nights a breeze) and has no problem with diaper changes or clothing changes.

We both knew having a baby in the midst of a deployment would be a big gamble but it sure has paid off. What a gentle little soul he is. Sometimes I almost forget I have 3 little ones because he is so quiet. And Natalie and Adam's only frustration is that they can't hold him and kiss him all the time.

So there's the latest update from Dreamland. I have no doubt there will be some turbulence and rockier roads ahead (such is the nature of parenthood), but what a great transition we've had so far...

Travels

We are back from our latest excursion. A two day trip to the zoo and then an exciting ride on Thomas the Tank Engine. Between the animals and the beloved train character Natalie and Adam hardly knew what to do with themselves. Such seasoned little travelers they are! Excited to help with packing and loading the car, straining to see what's going on outside the van windows, encouraging me to "race" the other cars on the road, jumping excitedly on hotel beds and building new forts under tables, they could stay forever it seems.



The only thing that could have made our trip more perfect would be Daddy coming along with us... With each trip we take it reaffirms that as much as we miss Tim and would love to be together again, there is still joy in spite of the changes, the missing him. As he so aptly put it before leaving, life doesn't stop just because I'm away, we have to keep on living and enjoying life and not just waiting for this year to be over. There is so much to experience and so many memories we will have to share... I guess it really does come down to perspective...

Only 10 more days till R&R!!!

My Girl

Our little birthday girl. Has it really been 4 years since you enchanted us with your smile, your calm, steady gaze, your dancing feet and laughing eyes?

The lament I once imagined I'd feel at the passing of years has been replaced with such deep enjoyment and wonder at the little person you are.

Strong of opinion, never hesitant to speak your mind, sweet of heart, always concerned about Adam's needs and asking if I need any help. Without even asking you come upon me in my daily tasks and pick up a dishcloth to wipe down a counter or a broom to sweep the floor. In the morning I find fresh flowers in my bathroom vase and little presents from you on my night table.

You find such excitement in living things, in growing plants and caring for small creatures. Our yard is filled with little homes and habitats for your "pets" and our flower boxes always freshly tilled and new things growing there by the day...

Your spirit is generous. Even today, your day you saw how much your little brother enjoyed some of your gifts so you gladly filled your arms and set them up in his room..

Your mind is inquisitive, always wanting to be a part of whatever conversation is going on, with the store clerk, a friend on the telephone, a conversation with Daddy, you want to know everyone and everything...

You absorb so much, things I didn't even think you notice. Like a few brief lessons on littering. Now you see a gum wrapper fall out of my pocket and you are the first one to say, "Mom, you better pick that up, you don't want to be a glitterbug!" (sounds better than litterbug I guess).

You are a teacher by nature. Showing Adam how to do everything from work a Playdough ice cream maker to reading him a story. While playing with your new fairy garden set today you solemnly held up a baby swan and said, "Mom, when a swan is a baby it is called a cigarette."

Much as you may be rivals at time for toys and attention you love no one more than your little brother."Sit in my lap Adam", you'll say, patting a lap barely big enough to hold him and yet he comes, crawling up on you and settling in to listen. Before bed each night you cannot sleep until you've stopped in his room to sing him a lullaby.

You amaze me with your open heart, your grace, your joy for life. I cannot take any credit. All of these beautiful gifts you bring to the world were instilled in you by hands larger and stronger than my own, by a Heart that truly knows you inside and out.

I cannot wait for the years to come, to see you swing those doors wide and embrace the life you are created for.

Happy Birthday Natalie! It is you who are truly a gift.

Road Trip

We just arrived back from a 3 day road trip to Charlotte, NC. And aside from the hectic nature of packing suitcases and a cooler and loading up the van, along with forgetting keys, dome lights that would not turn off in the van, occasional bouts of whining, potty fiascos and the search for a clean gas station bathroom we had a blast.

Natalie and Adam seem born for the road. Lots of storytelling, laughing, singing of songs and asking of millions of unanswerable questions made the trip enjoyable and far from boring. Both "Daddy dolls" came with us and made it feel Tim wasn't so far away. Just a squeeze around the middle and one of the dolls would come to life with his voice.

It was incredibly exciting for them (and exhausting for me) once we arrived at the hotel and went about the business of loading up the luggage cart and making several trips back and forth from the van to the room. We checked out the pool only to find no steps for toddlers to splash on or even a shallow end. So into the pool we went, both of them deciding to jump tandem onto my head and almost upsetting all three of us. After 20 minutes of spinning around and paddling lopsidedly back and forth we ended that and headed back to settle in.

After a colorful exploration of downtown Charlotte we headed for a trolley ride. What I found incredibly hot and cramped, Natalie and Adam found adventure in. Hanging from sidebars, bouncing up and down on the seats, not really noticing the heat, they were mesmerized.

Then it was off to Discovery Place. Caught up with a dear friend from college and grad school and the hours flew by as we chatted and the little ones played.

Next day we decided to check out a nature museum which was the biggest hit of the whole trip. Lots of reptiles and insects and wildlife and plenty of hands on activities.

Definitely tired at the end of the days but overall it was so worth it. So many great memories and honestly at times I almost forgot I was pushing 35 weeks till those end of the day backaches caught up with me or I had to climb up a McDonald's playplace slide after Adam.

One more trip after this and then our new little guy will make his appearance, hopefully AFTER Daddy gets back home for R&R!

Missing

So we have been desperately missing our Daddy lately. How thankful I am that it's been working itself out in positive ways. Today Natalie and Adam found one of Daddy's old berets and took turns marching around wearing it and talking in a "deep voice" just like Daddy. They even wanted me to take turns calling them Daddy. They were giggling and running around excitedly and I breathed a prayer of thanks for the optimistic upbeat spirit in our home. As long as they're okay, I'm golden...